Gears of the Abyss

I’m one person. One slightly sleep-deprived, probably-cursed person. These beauties are handcrafted—no machines, no minions, no factory line nonsense. That means each one takes 2–3 weeks to complete. If you’re in a rush, summon a time god. Otherwise, sit tight while I work my magic.

Gears of the Abyss isn’t for the faint of heart or the mildly caffeinated. This deep-sea-meets-deep-space monstrosity is an unholy union of eldritch tentacles and gritty steampunk mechanics. It’s like someone gave a kraken a wrench set and a shot of espresso—and said, “Go nuts.”

Hand-sculpted with obsessive attention to chaos, every inch of this tumbler tells a story: glowing abyssal eyes, dripping marine magic, and more gears than a Victorian time machine convention. Whether you’re brewing sea-salted tears or molten lava bean juice, this beast will hold it without flinching.

And yes, it’s heavy on the detail. Because subtlety is boring.

Product Features:

• Sculpted tentacles & steampunk gearwork in glorious 3D detail

• Metallic highlights and rich textures from ocean floor to gear shaft

• Vacuum insulated stainless steel core

• Lid included (because I respect your need to not spill eldritch horrors on yourself)

• Hand-wash to preserve every glorious tentacle

• Not microwave or dishwasher safe—unless you enjoy eldritch meltdowns

• Designed for those who drink with intent and probably questionable morals